.dilemma. || 19th October 2008 ||

just got off the phone.
and it just got me crying.
not exactly cry cry la.
just you know tears rolling down my cheeks a bit.
yeah like that la.

and i hate it when ppl make you be in a dilemma.
i mean sometimes what they say is true and all that.
but you dont have to make ppl feel bad bout what you ask them to do that they dont want to right..?

yeahh i know probably after i finish secondary sch its gonna be college and uni.
hence, generally it means less time spent with parents and family.
honestly i never thought bout it if she didnt mentioned it just now.

anyway she came up with the whole idea that i should go and stay with her after i finish my exams.
i dont mind going anywhere else if its still in PG.
but its in KL.
i dont want.
there's so many things in PG that i cant leave.

friends is more than enough to keep me from leaving PG.
going to KL means there wont be any friends.
no friends = no life.
and its after SPM.
im suppose to be enjoying my holidays
and spending time with my buddies before we leave for different places.

what bout food..?
KL food sucks.
PG food rocks.
who cares what you think la but memang pun food means a lot to me.

and my classes..?
ballet..? organ..?
and just the other day i was talking bout wanting to pick up either jazz or hiphop.
damn.

and whats more her place there is not even KL.
its outskirts of KL.
= total no life.
nearest civilisation takes 15minutes.
how pathetic.

anyway.
what was the statement that made me feel bad..?

"you know we all how old d or not..?
we just want you here to accompany us.
then we dont have to worry bout you there so much ma.
no one is there to take care of you anyway.
just a few months.
then you're off to uni and coll and stuffs d."

there.
if your mum say that to you, what will you feel..?